Why was Timmy dirty? Because he was buried

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What do you call a large group of Apes attacking San Francisco? Well, it isn't called anything but coincidentally there is a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes which was released August 5, 2011 starring James Franco and Andy Serkis. -David Bruggen

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Two bananas are walking down the street. One says, "Nice weather we're having, isn't it?" The other banana says, "Wait a minute, fruit can't talk." The second banana turns into a dove and promptly flies away.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My room is a mess, Violets are still blue

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What isn't funny? The holacost.

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EVERYBODY THUMB THIS JOKE DOWN

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what's the difference between a male and female skeleton? The jaw bone structure

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whats funnier than hugos penis? Nothing!!!!

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What happened when the man stuck his hand in the blender? Nothing, it was turned off.

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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What's the difference between basketball and an elephant? One's a sport and one's a large African animal.

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*knock knock* "who's there?" "me, the person who knocked..duh"

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3 women are eating popsicles, one is biting, one is licking, and one is sucking, which is married? The one with the wedding ring.

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Q: What is the difference between a Ginger and a shoe? A: A shoe has a sole

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How is an orange like an airplane? They both have wings except an orange doesn't have wings

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef

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roses are red violets are blue dinosaurs are extinct obama is black

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink. (Don't ask me how that's possible, just go with it) As the bartender is pouring it, he asks "Why the long face?" The horse responds "My son died of cancer this morning..."

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Why did the coconut fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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what's silver and red and keeps crashing into the walls? a baby with forks in its eyes

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Yo mamas so fat that she slowly had developed obstructive sleep apnea syndrome and had died due to an obstruction of her upper airway while she was sleeping.

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Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

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Did you hear about the guy who fell out of the stands at the ranger game? He died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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