How do you get a Jew in a car? Ask him to get in. How do you get him out? (If they say tell him to get out) Tell him Hitler is driving (If not) Ask him to kindly step out of the vehicle.

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Q: How does a robber get into your house? A: Through a door.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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God

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What do you call a Pokemon without a trainer? A wild pokemon.

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What do you call a black kid with a backpack? I don't know.

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why does Chuck Norris never get wet in the rain? Because he has a very serviceable umbrella

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and the bartender comes over and asks him what he wants to drink. The man replies, "Carrot Juice."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to see the CN tower. He was then hit by a fridge dropped by people running tests on the top floor.

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Why did the man go bald? He had cancer

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What's better than Jack Daniels? Jack Daniels Jr.

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A women's opinion.

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One watermelon said the the other watermelon, "you are looking mighty plump today", the other watermelon didn't say anything because watermelons cant talk

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A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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What did the ketchup say to the mustard? Nothing they're just condiments.

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Dr Dr I think I have diarrhea You have irritable bowel syndrome, I recommend IBS support

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what's brown and sticky? A stick

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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Whats white and sticky and falls from the sky? The Cumming of the lord

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. -sensored-

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Leslie's husband admitted to being gay, which came to the surprise of no one, seeing as Leslie is a man.

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WHO FRAMED ROGER RABBIT? roger rabbit while hilarious, was an idiot and framed himself....mind F***.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia ...where am I

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Why was the cook arrested? Tax evasion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops