I like pancakes. I like pancakes. We have no pancakes

An Iraqi, an American and an Irishman get on a plane. They all enjoy the in-flight amenities, agree that the food was sub-standard and arrive at their destinations safely.

I was at the ocean, and I saw a screaming fish. Then it died.

roses are red violets are blue i suck at poems show me your boobs

What is the difference between a mustache, and a pile of dead babies? Mustaches disgust me.

Your mom walked into a bar and got kicked out cause there's no dogs allowed.

How do you save a black man from drowning? You throw him a flotation device.

Why did the little girl fail her test? Because she had mental retardation.

What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Unless it's muscular dystrophy.

Q: What did the man say before he was stabbed? A: "What are you gonna do, stab me?"

What did the explorer say to the new species Oh look it says squirtle let's call it squirtle Oh look it say woof let's call it poochyena

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted. You're adopt...wait what?

vaginas

Why was the little boy late to church? He was getting raped by the priest. ....the priest was late too.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

What happend to the gay kid that walked into iran. He got shot and killed ????

What do you do if your computer breaks: Go on your phone. What do you do if your phone breaks: Go on you iPod What do you do if your iPod breaks: Then your screwed and you should get a Job and learn not to break things.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind and is a women, who are notoriously bad drivers.

Knock Knock Whos there? Jonny Jonny who? Jonny tsunami, hope you can swim Japan

Your mother was a hamster, And your father smelt of ElderBerries!

If there's a clown in a blender, how do you get him out? Tostitos.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Why did the man die? Because he was unpopular and someone killed him with a gun. He is now dead. RIP.

Men don't cum twice easily. That's why Jesus hasn't been around for awhile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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