A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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Harry Styles

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I never asked for this.

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

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Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road? To get to the other side.

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Now Showing: EVIL SLOTHS II "The worst death is a slow death."

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing ? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Well it cant be sarah

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What did the blind football player say to his coach? I cant see

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What did the woman say when the man got her flowers? "Why thank you."

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Roses are red Violets are buckets This poem makes no sense Boobs

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what did tyrone want for Christmas? A dad.

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Chuck Norris is so tough, he trained diligently for many years and is now a widely respected martial artist

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzie.

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What did the Canadian Goose say to the Snow Goose? You're white.

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Your mama's so fat.... I ran around her twice, And got lost

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Yo momma so fat, she died.

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How do you like your eggs in the morning? -Poached or Fertilised?

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Aladdin found a rusty old lamp at the foot of a mountain. He rubbed it and the Ginnie had died after the long drop from the cliff

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An asian is driving a car. He observes the speed limit and uses his turning signals while switching lanes.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i got one question Screw You

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What do you do if a Polish soldier throws a hand-grenade at you? Run.

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WHAT'S LESS THAN 0? FIONN'S DIGNITY AFTER HENRY'S

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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