Two scientists walk into a bar. One says "I'll have H20", the other says "I'll have a beer." The first one is the one to drive them to their homes.

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Roses are black Violets are black Grass is blac- Oh wait, it's night time. I'll be back in 12 hours.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? Sitting on a black man is just plain rude.

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A biology teacher walks into a bar. "Ouch," he says. "I bet I just lost some brain cells. I wonder if any of them were going through mitosis..."

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing

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This is a sentence. This is also a senctence.

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Wow, so it is true, you are here the entire fucking time aren't you bitch? You and all "six billion of your followers of the dark", listen asshead, one thing is people asking ME when I FUCKING SIGN BOOKS (which does not happen all that FUCKING OFTEN!) Why I lead a fucking cult of sorts. Another one is having your goons stab me in the FUCKING EYE, and going "Oh I am like so sorry, please let me be the gayest I can be" People assaulting me because I use the "Moralman identity" IT IS MINE! My real FUCKING NAME IS NERO! I DON'T GO AROUND STEALING NOBODY`S SHIT!

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What word is ten letters long and starts with gas? Gastronomy.

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What's black and red all over? Half a cat

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Why did the black kid fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome

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Fun Fact getting married to your first cousin is legal in CT... bet you thought there was joke coming right about now..........

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Roey Jegen

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A man named Joe has practiced drawing cartoon characters his entire life. When Joe turns 15 he decides to enter a local drawing competeiton. Joe works very hard drawing his cartoon and finally finishes. When it is the time to hand in his drawing his drawing, he hands it in an receives a satisfying 2nd place and continues on with his life. Two years later Joe decides to enter another drawing competeiton (this one much more competitive) after his drawing skills have tremendously increased. He begins drawing and is 3/4 of the way finished when Joe is brutally murdered by a mentally disturbed man and cannot hand in his art work and is therefore disqualified from the competeiton and loses.

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Roused are red violets are blue I just s*** in my own poo

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got into the car? "Robin, get in the car."

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25

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Billy: hey dave, wanna hear a joke? Dave: what? Billy: oh yeah, you are deaf.

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do you like walffles?Yes I like walffles!

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what rhymes with pirates? not Somalia because i don't consider a inflatable boat a pirate ship.

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Three men of different race and religion are on a plane; they enjoy their flight, and two of them have a good meal with no pork. Thirty years later, two of the men share the same flight, but failed to even recognize each other on the first.

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What did the booger say the other booger? "Is he picking on you again"

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Why did the mother tell her son to get a job. She was tired of buying Generic brand food.

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Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

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What do a blond and a jar of marmalade have in common? Nothing, they are completely different.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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