A brown haired woman walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor it hurts whenever I touch myself." The doctor says, "Strange, I have never heard of such a disease. Please show me." The woman touches her leg and screams,"Ow!" Then she touches her arm and screams again. The doctor asks, "Are you a natural brunette?" The woman replies, "No, I am a blonde." The doctor says, "Oh, that explains it. You have a broken finger. God, you are so blonde." The woman gets her finger treated and then lives in agony for the rest of her life due to her untreated broken leg and arm.

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Jesus once got nailed to a cross, beaten and gave his life in order to prove he was immortal. Safe to say, people remain impressed even 2000 years later. Moral: Lol, hey, its quite a feat, but what life did he give if he was immortal? Jesus is a okay dude though, he stole donkeys from stables (for transport) and when his disciples asked if stealing was bad he replied: God will provide for them. Awesome.

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What does a Jewish Santa Clause say? This scenario is highly improbable as Jews celebrate Hanukkah and not Christmas.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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What do you call a fat indian boy Eeeeeeeh fatty boy

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

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what do you call a fish with no eyes? fsh

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Dylan Hodge fingered himself. Hah.

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Im going to france... Why To get french fries! Have fun Im back with a $10000bill to pay Wheres the fries Shit

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when life throws you lemons your an idiot because it wont

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whats more annoying than being raped by a giant scorpian? finding out that half the anti-jokes are terrible

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shut up iggy

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Q: Where did little Suzie go during the bombing? A:Everywhere

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A black man says "ask" correctly.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gate open and chickens typically wonder with no obvious pattern to their movements.

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Police Report: A 100 year old man was beaten to death on his centennial birthday. Sources claim to say he was "getting his birthday punches"

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what did the african child get for his birthday? water, it is a very scare resource were he comes from and is considered a great present

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Why was the fat man removed from the restaurant? When his date didn't show up he started and crying and proceeded to stab himself with a fork

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A man walks into a bar...... He then wakes up in a hospital. along with a large bruise on his forehead.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Why did the boy cry? Because his mother died of a heart attack.

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Why wasn't my T.V. on? Because I didn't have a remote.

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Where do you go when your friends called you spoiled? Africa.

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What's worse then finding a finger in your Chili? Getting Mollested by a Pterodactyl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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