How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to end the lives of two male individuals and paralyze the the third male individual from the hip down.

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

What do you call a dead prostitute? - You (or friends name) in 10 years

What do you call a puppy with no limbs? It doesn't matter, he's never coming back.

If a fish eats fish bait, and a dog eats dog bait, what does a master eat? Anything he feels like eating at the given moment provided it is in accordance to his diet and beliefs.

adam sucks off disabled old men for a pac of biscuits

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did Little Timmy fall off of his bike? Because he was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator. Knock knock Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

A baby elephant steps on a lego. First thought, auch, huh ?! Actually, the lego was fine with it and so was the baby elephant. Now they're married and are expecting a baby legophant.

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

Why was a group of children being driven away by a black man? Michael was the students bus driver, he was taking them to the zoo.

jay hefti is so cool and alex askew is hot

Why couldn't the Black man become a surgeon? He was Blind.

Why did Paul Walker cross the road? He wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

Dogs in my home.

Why did they bury the pope on the side of the hill? Because he is dead

A Irish man walks our of a bar

What did the little boy say after he was pushed off the cliff? Nothing. He died, therefore, he is incapable of speaking.

what do you call a white guy on a bus load of blacks guys? probably his name...

This is a joke setup.

A man walks into a bar Then another man shoots him in the head because he has anger issues.

Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

Cleveland winning something

--Knock Knock Who's there? --Banana Banana who? --Knock Knock You just said that --Sorry i have Alzheimer's

Roses are white Violets are black I'm colorblind That is sad

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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