What do you call a Jewish wanna be gangster? Drake

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whats worse than being cold? having a pine cone shoved up your ass.

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Q: What is red and green and goes 100/mph? A: A frog in a blender

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Q. have you seen stevie wonders last album? A. neither has he.

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum is fat and so are you

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yous are all f u c k i n g dumb like rat kavanagh

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What do Bear Grylls drink under breakfast? Tea.

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Your momma's so dumb, she had to spend an extra hour studying for her mathematics test.

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A Black Guy, A Mexican, A White guy, an Indian guy, Santa Clause and The Easter Bunny Jump off a 500 foot cliff. Which one dies? The all do. But Santa dies first because of his weight and mass.

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Leave her alone...

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Hey Eliz, just a final thought, if and when I die (hey I am your step dad after all, dont forget I am four years older than you now! So ill die first anyway, hopefully) Promise me that you will call me on the phone and either yell SNAKE ANSWER ME SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! Or BOSS ANSWER ME BOOOOOOOOOOSS! Never mind, I never liked videogames ironically, but hey, its funny, Suddenly this Boss guy shows up, and I feel like I have something in common with someone! A game character anyway, and its a fucking boring game too, just sneaking around, then you got to well pay people to build shit and I shut it off by then... ...Finally the nurses are here... Those guys again, hey guys, I cant speak nor remember what button to press to delete shit, but I heard bogosexuals with an h, dont get the message, you see the man with broken fingers there, go get me female nurses or... They sleeping? And not with me? Okay guys, get me out of here, I am humiliating myself in front of my uh... Frienddaughtersisterthing as for the rest of you fucks, has it ever seemed like I have ever cared about your inferior opinions above my superhuma... I am drun or something huh guys? 60 MG valium? You fucking murderers! Well will that other dru.. Fine then... Nero The End? Seriously flaggots! I cant stop typing, just get me out of this... Wheelchair? When did that happen? Well roll me out then! And please you know, fill that code thing and the terms and all that.

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If a girl sleeps with 20 guys, she's a slut. If a guy does the same... He's Gay.

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Why can't Jimmy walk ever again? Because when he was 12 his father mistook him for a plank of wood a sawed his legs off. We may realise here that this prohibits him from walking.

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So a horse walks into a bar, animal service is called and after being unable to locate the owner he is put down.

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What do you call a black person flying an airplane? a pilot you racist

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:y do people talk? ;idk :oh then nevermind

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Who the hell are you?

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What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot for Arabian Air, idiot. What were you thinking?

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What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

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when life throws you lemons your an idiot because it wont

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Q. you know who is so sad A. you for looking up a site for jokes that aren't even good

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Knock Knock Who's there? Luke Futie

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Why did the little girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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