A lobster walks up to an octopus. What does he say? Nothing. Lobsters cannot talk.

Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm blind.

What's black, blue and smells like fish? A dead penguin.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

yo mamas so cruchy people might mistake her for a cheeto!

A man walks into a bar. Later that night he comes home to an intervention and realizes he has a drinking has hurt him and his family.

Why did the Afircan child die? He had AIDS.

What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a woman? Two people of the opposite gender having sex.

Why was Abraham Lincolin President. He was elected by the people of the united states.

roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

What do you call red eyes in the dark? A high black man

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

Did you hear about Helen Keller's dog? Neither did she.

Moral below, I understand you are one of us, but you are not supposed to act when I, your leader is spreading the message, if you want to risk harming the fundation behind your status as a shadow and its benefits, I suggest you cease signing your comments with moral. Moral the friendly neighbourhood r*pist: "Ruining the fundation behind the life of your choosing, will always end up ruining your chance to live and act freely, if you are a true shadow, then you will follow and obey"

A man walks into a bar and starts telling anti-jokes to his friend. His friend is a follower and laughs even though they aren't funny.

Is this the krusty krab? No, this is Patrick

rape that shit

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

Life is like a box of chocolates. Well...not really no. It's not.

Is this the krusty krab? NO! THIS IS red lobster, how many i help you?

Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

why was 6 afraid of 7 He raped him the other day

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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