A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "How's it going?" The man replies, "Bless you." The man walks out of the bar, as his peers realize he was honest when he told them a week earlier that he had autism.

What do men and women have in common? They're both respected members of society, besides women.

What's the anonymous name for vampire hunters? The KKK.

What happened when the homosexual man came out of the closet? He was congratulated for winning the hide and seek contest.

Roses are red Bacon is too Rhyming is hard bacon

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was crudely stapled to another chicken who insisted on doing so.

Hey I just meet you And this is crazy I took bath salts Your face looks tasty

Why was the man sweating? He was stuck in a burning house.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names

Why did John go outside? His house was on fire.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has two penises

What do you call a dead baby lying in the road? A Tragedy

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

Why can't men give birth? Because men do not not have the reproductive organs required to give life to a new born child.

What is better than a cat? Nothing

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What about the vampires?

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is black

Q: What did the student say to the teacher? A: The answer is four.

Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

knock knock ... no one was in

I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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