How do u make a fat person cry......... tell em mc donnalds is closed (^_^)

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if u like this i wont pay you a dollar

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3 thieves are also murderers and naked at the moment.

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Knock knock. *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

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Well educated black man.

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3 friends are out camping. One says to the other "It sure is a great day to go fishing." The other says "Yes indeed." The third one says "I agree." After a few minutes of hiking, they go to lake and begin fishing.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? F*ck

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because seven, eight, nine.

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Guy 1: why are you such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most p***y

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its was amazinglysmooth fuck off

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Why was Michael Jackson seen shopping at Kmart? Because he heard little boys pants were 50% off the original price.

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Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she fell out the window and landed in soot.

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what do you get when you cross an elephant with a lake? swimming trunks.

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A horse walks into a bar. Being unable to comprehend human emotion, he shits all over the floor.

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What happens when a black man falls out of a tree? He gets hurt.

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God is almighty, as such he ANSWERS TO NO ONE! Moral: What you praying for then bitch?

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How do you get your little brother to stop kicking you? Stick his feet in the garbage disposal.

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A neutron walks into a bar. He orders a drink and ponders why his mother gave him the name, "A neutron."

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Your mama is so fat she suffered from diabetes and died of heart failure .

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What's worse than a snake in your boot. A boot in your snake.

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I'm not late, I'm fashionably tardy!!!!

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What's black, brown and red? My dog as a serial killer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase as a chicken its intulect this very low so walking in the middle of the street was it's 1st instest. Ther'for it crossed the road and made it to the other side safe. Now please don't ask me a stupid question like that again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops