Kid: mom what happens when grandpa farts? Mom: well son... Everyone leaves the room

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

What's big and red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater!

what do you call 10 mexicans standing in a line? It's probably a lunch line for a taco vendor. And even this is just a coincidence. Everybody loves tacos.

what did helen keller say to the nazi? -nothing, helen keller was blind and deaf so she could never aquired the ability to speak

What did the collage professor say to the plumber? Hi.

What time is it when you should go to the dentist? About ten minutes before whatever happens to be the time of your appointment.

What's funnier than 24? 25

Why Did the one handed man cross the road? To get to the dying man on the other side

Why was the black man escorted from the bar? Because the bartender was racist.

Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

Did you know brown and green rhyme? Just not with each other.

Knock knock Who's there? Carrot Carrot who? Carrot in the tree house, cause it's orange.

Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

52 Prostitutes in a bar. Challenge Accepted.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

Why did the autopilot of a plane malfunction even though the pilots had engaged the switch? The pilots had taken manual control. I lied about the switch.

Have you heard the deaf guitarist? He's really good.

What did the sign say at Disney World? Disney World.

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut? A Heart Attack.

What starts with P and ends in ORN? Porn.

Q:Why did the cop arrest the black guy with a gun? A: because he shot a family and when the funeral was held he cooked a grenade killed everyone and peed on there grave, later he rapped two dogs and stabbed a crippled then tea bagged a horse to death.

what do you call dominic rolling down a hill?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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