What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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There's two bears in the shower. One bear says "pass the soap". The other bear says "no soap. Radio".

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Why did god smite the homosex man with all of heavens wrath? For shits and gigs.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will have her institutionalized as soon as they find her.

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3 men were involved in a terrible plane crash. The first man got up, and all he could see was blue. Blue houses, blue cars, blue people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see blue. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops, then left in his blue world. The second man got up and all he could see was red. Red houses, red cars, red people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see red. He went down stairs and ate cherrieos, then left in his red world. The last man got up, and all he could see was yellow, yellow cars, yellow houses, and yellow poeple. Yet again he walked to a house, and the kind people let him stay the night. Once he woke up, he only could see yellow still. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops and left into his yellow world. So this proves that 2 out of 3 men prefer fruit loops over cherrieos.

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Your mother was a hamster, And your father smelt of ElderBerries!

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What's red and goes pop? A clip art of the word "Pop"

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How come Hellen keller is blind and deaf? Cause she is a women.

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what's the difference between a male and female skeleton? The jaw bone structure

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Behind every fat girl is a beautiful woman. No, seriously. Get out of the way.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a bus.

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The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, "Oh...Well, that's not so bad. At least I don't have AIDS."

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whats worse than getting raped by your mom getrting raped by a giant scorpian

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What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.

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whats funnier than hugos penis? Nothing!!!!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your real father. I left you when you were a month old and I have regretted the decision ever since. I would like to be a part of your life.

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How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you came 'cause GameGrumps Fuck you.

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i don't get it...none of these are funny.

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Roses are red, Sometimes they're white. Or pink. Or yellow. There are roses of many colors.

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Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

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whats 2+2? math.

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free shit is cool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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