Man 1:Doctor Doctor, I've got 59 seconds to live! Man 2: This is a chemist

Matt is not funny.

What is orange and smells like a jewish cat. Nothing

How do you survive a snow storm? Kill yourself

Q: Why does my arm itch? A: I got bit on the arm by a mosquito

There once was a man from Nantucket But then he moved to Boston and changes his name to "man from Boston"

Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

An 8 year old, a 9 year old, and jerry sandusky walk into a shower...

On Friday the 13th,I had one of those dreams of when you go to school in your underwear. I then realised it wasn't a dream.

Whats worse then losing your phone? The Holocaust

Hope you all drop the soap in prison

Why can't George Washington drive? Because he died!

Whats worse than malaria? Dying from it.

What did the man say after falling off the bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a terrible and painful death on impact.

A horse walked into a bar, the bartender asked "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, as it was a horse and did not speak English nor understand what the man had said, the horse then stumbled around the bar for a while, confused, before finding the exit and leaving.

Q: What is a man? A: A miserable little pile of secrets.

what makes the world go round? An axis (just jokin, its COFFEE)

She said no

A Duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'd like to buy some peanuts." The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't sell peanuts." The duck turns around and leaves.

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

A fish and a human had a conversation. The conversation was not interesting because fish can't speak and the human felt awkward.

Whats horny and big A dick minus the big part!

What did the suicide bomber say on new years day? Happy new year.

why doesnt bally lifeguard he isnt qualified

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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