how do make you a child cry? break his fingers

There was a screwdriver and a spoon. What did the screwdriver say to the spoon? Nothing because neither of them are living objects and it is impossible for inanimate objects to talk.

what did the black guy say to his pregnant wife? im very excited to see our newborn child.

A girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

Helen Keller went to town riding on a pony she stuck a feather in her hat and called it uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

What is more worse than death? Death

Q- Who is the life of the party? A- hannah schane

What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

Q: what did the nazi say to the other nazi A: hallo

Why did the baby cross the road? It's abusive father punted it.

Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. 9/11 who? Oh my god, I thought you said you'd never forget.

A Jew walks into a bar. He quickly works on treating the injuries he had received from hitting his head against the bar when he had walked into it.

What is worse than finding an Apple in your Worm? Watching your dog jumping of a cliff

Sex is not the answer. Sex is a question. Yes is the answer.

whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

Whats worse then Justin Bieber? It's a trick question, there's is nothing worse than her

What is 0+0? 0, I am not dumb

A man walks in a barn. He lifts his bucket of food and starts feeding his horses.

Q: How do you make a black man nervous? A: Threaten to kill his family.

What's blue and says "Good morning" A blue sign that says good morning

A pig and an elephant walk into a bar. But the pig doesn't even make it into the bar because the mentaly insane elephant ate him. Ouch

What do you do if your computer breaks: Go on your phone. What do you do if your phone breaks: Go on you iPod What do you do if your iPod breaks: Then your screwed and you should get a Job and learn not to break things.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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