Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

when i start seeing A TON of black people what does that mean? im color blind

Q-What do you call kids who go to school? A- Students.

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? None. They use candles

you'r mom is so fat that whenever she goes to the doctors, they are concerned about her cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.

why do girraffe's have long necks? because my foot is so far up all their asses that it hits their head, pushing it away from the body.

Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

What did the one bagpiper say to the other? Nothing, one cannot speak while playing the bagpipes.

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H20" and the second one says, "I'll have some H20 too." The second scientist dies after drinking hydrogen peroxide.

whats green and has wings ? a flying patch of astro turf

What did the chicken say to the dog? Well, since chickens can't talk, they both stood there in an awkward silence.

two men are sitting in a desk next to each other learning math when the equation 22+1 came up. the frist man says to the second, "24" and they both giggled. the second guy then slips his lips over the the first guy and whispers, "hey, i just thought of something funnier than 24" to which the first replies with a slight of laughter, "lemme hear it." so the second says with laughter "25".

Its a bird! No, it's a plane! Oh... so it is.

What's black, white, has green stripes and smells like eggs? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

Why was the blonde girl stupid? She had suffered sever brain damage the previous month and was still recovering.

KKK

my captcha says : forkin chickens

What is the difference between a black man and a white man? The pigment in their skin.

Why wasn't the man able to see his son? He got run over by a train. Knock knock Who's there? The man. He was kidding about being run over.

What's black and white and red all over? A chess board; I lied about the "red all over" part.

I am reading the Terms of Service, however I don't fully agree with it's contents.

Why was six afraid of seven? because seven had diarrhea

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...