What happens when someone with ADD tells a joke? I forgot.

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Hey I just met? you and this is crazy I have alzheimers Hey I just met you

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whats black and white and slides on its belly a penguin

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You read the Terms of Service.

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Want to hear an urban legend? There's a straight feminist.

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Two corns were decided to get married. In wedding, bridegroom can't find bride, so he asked a popcorn next to him, "Do you know where is the bride?" The popcorn answered, "I just change my hair style."

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A man walked into a metal bar, they were playing Metallica.

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i drive all the time its no big deal open the door and get behind the wheel

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What's the difference between gays and straights? Sexual orientation

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I t was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Why couldn't the black kid buy a bike? He had no money.

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SHEA CAPOLUPO HAS A TINY SHLONG. 8- turn your head sideways haha.

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Why did the fisherman die on a fishing trip? He had a heart attack.

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Why Was Mary Short? She Had No Legs.

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Person 1-How do you spell pulmonary embolism? Person 2-P-U-L-M-O-N-A-R-Y E-M-B-O-L-I-S-M. Person 1- Thanks. Person 2- Your Welcome.

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why did the grandpa drop his big mak??? Because an army tank hit him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had places to be

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what do you call a kid without arms and legs? Freak

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

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wheres binladin? at the bottom of the sea wanking over amy winehouse

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since when?

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Why can't Jimmy walk ever again? Because when he was 12 his father mistook him for a plank of wood a sawed his legs off. We may realise here that this prohibits him from walking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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