Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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So a Quadriplegic walks into a bar.....

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O: How do you kill a black man? A: Shoot him

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What is brown and sticky. Hot chocolate.

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What happens when a rabbit is late for a very important date? Nothing, rabbits have no logical way to keep track of time.

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i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. The muffins do not talk or move, because they not living.

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A blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead walk into a bar. They all buy a drink and talk about their days.

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varför skriver jag på svenska jag vet inte

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You ask a German how long it takes to go from Berlin to Amsterdam. He replies, ''About four hours by tank."

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There's 2 cows, one says to the other "What do you think of Mad Cow Disease?" The other says, "I don't care I'm a helicopter"

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What do you call a 6 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor.

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There is a black guy, British guy, and a Spanish guy in a room. Wait that'll never happen, black people hate Spanish people.

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What do you get when you cross an intersection? Possibly a lower leg contussion, ACL tear, breaks in 4 different sections of your arm and lots of brain swelling if you are hit by a car.

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girl: why do you love me? boy: i don't.

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What's worse than eating cows. Death

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Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

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Why did the Spice Girls stop performing? They mutually agreed to stop performing.

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Roses are red, violets are blue God made me beautiful, how about you?

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why did the dog have 2 legs? he got cut in half.

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Why did the school bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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Did you know brown and green rhyme? Just not with each other.

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What's a black man's favorite food? It depends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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