KNOCK! KNOCK! Who's there?! ... Ditched again!

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What did the engineer say to the supervisor? Hi.

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What did the one horse say to the other. Nothing because horses can't talk.

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Why is the little boy so smart? He tries in school and hes asian

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What happens if you shoot a chicken? It dies.

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What do you call a man who is dirty, and is searching through a pile of garbage? A man who threw out his divorce papers.

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Why did the chicken die? He tried to cross a road by an alleyway, therefore getting hit by a double decker bus and the alleyway has nothing to do with it. Also, the chicken had one leg and was blind.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They were baked until the baker them until they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's long and hard? The Ap European exam that i just took.

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Penis.

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Its a bird...its a plane....it IS a plane

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whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

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How do u get a baby to stop choking? Take ur c*ck out if its mouth!!!

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when im sad im feel horny i rape little children -jimmy saville , last words of the diary

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Why did John fall down the stairs? Because John is a paraplegic and there wasn't a sufficient wheelchair ramp at his access.

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Why did the boy cross the road He didnt he got hit by a car

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I like to use vasoline during sex. I put it on the doorknob so she can't escape.

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How do you make someone think your wierd? Pretend to be a panda.

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Q: What did the Big Bad Wolf say to Little Red Riding Hood? A: Nothing, wolfs are mentally nor physically capable of talking

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Why did you insult me and then punch me in the face? The hell if you care anymore, I killed you straight after. Neo-Nero. (Rest in peace Nero7 better known as The Moral Man, I hope I can one day live up to your greatness.) Moral: "Keep your spirits up, we are all going to die sometime, but life means nothing if we lose faith in ourselves and each other" Moral 2: "Nero Septimus, that will be my first and last moral that made a figment of fucking sense, if you are watching from whatever comes from life, I know that this is what you would have done, but just so you know and always wanted for us that followed you, I am doing this for my own goddamn fucking self, respects... Now if your ghost is still watching, get the fuck out of my room you damn cripple, and know that your arm is somewhere in the basement because its so goddamn bad ass that it fucking freaks me out, and so fucking heavy that I think you where some sort of superhuman, now gtfo, as you taught us, we cant focus on the goddamn afterlife, if we are gonna get the best out of life and the present, adios amigo"

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? He looked at his gas bill.

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E= McVagina

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can people thumb up the evil dead statment below please... its important to me. (and the cup joke below) thanks people , ur great.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Boo I don't know anyone by the name of Boo. Go away

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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