Doctor, Doctor, I feel like there's two of me! There's not. Your long lost twin died of terminal cancer.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Why can't George Washington drive? Because he died!

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Your Mom is so fat... I'm sorry I didn't mean that.. I have abandonment issues.

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Two cannibals are eating a clown, one says to the other: "Maybe we should rethink our ways of life and realize why animals are on this planet"

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A woman walks into the living room while her husband is watching tv. The husband tells her "Make me a Sandwich", so she goes to the kitchen and makes him a sandwich like shes told to.

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What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realizing on your deathbed that you regret the life you've lived and hate the person you've become.

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Yo mama's so poor, she can no longer handle the down payments on her home and is in great need of financial aid

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whats worse than being late to school haveing your family killed by an angry peice of toast

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Suzie hates cancer, Her granny got killed by a driver that suffered from it

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Darude- Sandstorm

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An irishman walks into a bar and orders a beer.

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Kid: knock knock Orphan: whos there? Kid: not your parents

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How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

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What's worse than AIDS? Buying the anti-joke book

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What is long and black The unemployment line

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What is Debbie short for? She has no legs.

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What is the difference between your mom and a cow? One is a 1,500 pound beast, and one is a human being.

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Penal Dysfunction

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What did the feminist say to the CIS white male? I respect you as a person.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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