i was going to say a gay joke butt f*** it.

"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains." "Well that sounds like a mental illness and I deal predominantly with physical ailments"

Type 2 diabetics

Q: What is the meaning of life? A: We don't know. Dwight: FALSE. The answer to everything is 42.

Oh, I must be hearing things.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Hi.

How do you wake up Lady GAGA? A sludge hammer!

Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

why did the chicken cross the road? i don;t know, that's why i was asking you

whats black and blue and red all over? my wife shhh!

Your mother is so old that she is dead.

Wat is brown and sticky? A stick

what the difference between a kettle with a fever and a wooden mallet? I don't remember how the joke ends but your mothers a whore

whats Mario's favorite kind of jeans? Denim, denim, denim.

What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? Well neither has he.

Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

Your moms so poor that when she went to buy a bag of chips, she couldn't buy the bag of chips, because she didn't have enough money to buy the bag of chips

How do you kill zombie Jesus? You can't.

Why is Steven so gay? Because hes actually Richard Simmons

Why do seagulls fly over seas? Because if they flew over bays they'd be called bagels.

Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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