Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

So there are three black people on a plane. The pilot comes over the intercom and says "Wow wow wow wait a second... ...why are there only three people on this plane? This is a commercial flight"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock Knock Who's There? It's Me. Oh, OK. Come On In.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Obama: And then I said there would be a change. (hahahahahaha)

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than reading a bad joke Realizing it's yours.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Little Justin's bike has a flat tire has a flat tire. He asks his dad to inflate it. "Sure Justin I can fix that for you." Said his father. But he overinflates the tire, causing the tire to explode and ignite the chemicals. The house burns to the ground, killing Justin and his parents. The fire then spreads and the hole city burns. 50,000 people die.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What was the pirate's favorite letter W

thumb_up thumb_down +5

woman's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: Why is the earth round? A: I am Batman.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Teacher: "What is the outside layer on a tree?" Dog: "Bark" Teacher: "How would you describe the desert surface?" Dog: "Rough" Teacher: "Would you say that Abraham Lincoln was an intelligent man?" Dog: "Yarp"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What the did the man say to his boss? You are my boss.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

who's sexually attracted to bones? James Cornish

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

when i start seeing A TON of black people what does that mean? im color blind

thumb_up thumb_down +3

hardy har har.. i should be working on a school project right now!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder? An anachronistic hypothetical sporting event that would never happen.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Batman and Superman switched sidekicks. Superman didn't want Robin.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Its a bird! No, it's a plane! Oh... so it is.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man drops a penny between a Jew and a homosexual. The man says "oh excuse me," picks up his penny and continues with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the disabled boy get on Christmas morning? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops