How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.

What's the best way to look 10 pounds thinner? Lose 10 pounds

A very unattractive girl bent over in front of me. I proceeded to be sick, and then I choked on my sick. I died. My family mourn my death every day.

Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

what did the black guy say to his pregnant wife? im very excited to see our newborn child.

Why was 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 was a registered 6 offender

What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

Knock, knock. Whose there? Tits. Tits, who? SUCK EM'!

Sticks and stones may break my bones and they can also break cars.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face!

You're Adopted.

i was going to say a gay joke butt f*** it.

how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to order a couple drinks, and shortly leaves after drinking them, later ending up in a fatal car accident.

There is no joke here, stop reading.

irish wristwatch JLR

3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks. Thumbs up if you get it.

What's the difference between George Michael and a microwave oven? One is a human being and the other is a resourceful appliance.

Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

what is a model plus a poop plus a rhino plus a flamingo a peice of floob split in half or a shelby koon

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Apparently he can walk now.

What do you call a black man who works in a ice-cream truck? A Ice-Creem Man

There is a man with the surname of Westmoreland. This is a terrible name.

what do all 21 year olds have in common? there all 21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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