How do you give Salley enough energy swim against the river current? Add your own electric current.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Bushes are Red, Trees are Red... my garden is on fire...

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what happened to the boy that walked down the street he got hit by a falling street light

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

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There is a new film coming out, it is a re-make of "Fatal Attraction" The only difference is, it is about two tonnes of antimatter... [L]

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Q- Who is the life of the party? A- hannah schane

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

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What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

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Who would win in a fight between a polar bear and a tiger? Considering that they live in different habitats, the chances are very unlikely that they would ever interact.

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Why couldn't the boy sing? The boy could sing, but the thick layer of duct tape prevented him from doing so.

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what did the lonely boy get for christmas? the absence of a familly

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Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

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How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen

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whats hard, its not what you think a penis

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What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

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Why did the man get a haircut? Because he had long hair.

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What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

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Did you hear about the cow that could fly? Me either

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What's brown, dirty, and smells like feces? Feces

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whats used in the kitchen and hurts like fuck? a cheese-grater dildo

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Everyone knows a sandwich made with bacon, lettuce, and tomato is a BLT, but what do you call a sandwich made with tomato, bacon, and lettuce? A BLT.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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