A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because its a horse and cant speak or understand english and gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables and stools.

why was the boy sad...because scooby doo shot him with a harpoon

What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

a man walks into a bar he got hurt

Friends are a lot like snow You pee on them, they disappear

I tried to call my friend in Haiti. It went straight to vibrate.....

<=-[ J1MMY | Dubstep Maniacs Crew 4 Life ]-=>

An Indian man left a 20% tip after eating at the closest restaurant to him

What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications in the background while you're trying to play a game of Jetman so it starts lagging.

Did you hear about Helen Keller's dog? Neither did she.

Knock Knock Whos There Policeman Policeman who Please open then door your fathers been in a terrible car accident

A man walks into a bar. Dyslexia is not funny. -Tag

who is the wildest wild one? matt daly

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He was shot. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He was mentally disturbed. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure

i like tits

Whats red and smells like cherries? Cherries

a black kid goes and gets some cereal and spills some flower on him self and he goes to his grandma and says look grandma i`m white and then she slaps him he goes to his grandpa and says look grandpa i`m white and then he slaps him and then he goes to his mom and then says look mom i`m white and then she slaps him then he goes to his dad and then says dad i`ve been white for 20 minutes and i all ready hate yall nigas

What do you call the twin towers? An airport

Three logicians were travelling up to Scotland in a train. They saw a black cow standing parallel to the train tracks; the first sign of life since crossing the border. The first logician says "Oh, so they do have black cows in Scotland." The second logician says "No, they have at least one black cow in Scotland." The third logician says "No, they have at least one cow in Scotland, one side of which, at least, is black."

what is yellow and cant swim? a bull doser what has 4 wheels and is green? grass, i lied about the wheels what is worse than finding a worm in ur apple? having cancer

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

Why was the man reading various news articles on the Internet at 2:21 in the morning? Because at that time he could not sleep. Which meant he tried to find something else to fill his time up with.

What did the white man say to the black man? Hello

What was the pirate's favorite letter W

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...