once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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What do you call a group of jews hiding in an attic? Well, this sounds very similar to the events during World War II in which Anne Frank and various jewish refugees hid from the Nazis.

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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What is better than a cat? Nothing

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Why did the cow have a pain in his stomach. It has testicular cancer.

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What's worse than aids? Super aids.

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What has two legs but can't walk? A quadriplegic man who lost mobility in his legs due to a horrific logging accident.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What about the vampires?

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What's worse than giong to Hell? Nothing. Hell is as bad as it gets.

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Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I am.

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What is funny about a child with down syndrome? Nothing.

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A Jew and a German walk in a bar. they've accepted their peoples past and learned to move on with their lives

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

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Q. Why was the blonde fired from the M+M factory? A.She was addicted to meth.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Robin Robin Who? Robin Williams Whoa, too early bro

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Where did the watch-dog take the blind man on Saturday afternoon? Wherever the blind man wanted to go

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Fun fact: If you took the skin of an average person and laid it flat you would have enough to get a pretty serious criminal conviction, amirite?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Look at that bitches asss!!

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Why did a Monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Alcatraz is reopened only for Kevin's ma

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What do you get when you read a book? More knowledge in your brain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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