Why was the man thought to be peculiar? Because he had sex with a pistachio.

Q: What's long and gray and kills people? A: A gas pipe.

Ya know what's sad? You can only submit one dislike on this website.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't get back up? She had no legs.

Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

What's something 9/10 people enjoy? A gang rape.

People tell me im insane. Its all a conspiracy.

How do you save a black guy from drowning? You don't.

Your Mama is so fat, when she jumped on the couch, she broke the couch.

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

What's Jewish and gay? Henry Shine

What's worse than discovering that you have contracted HIV? Stumbling upon a mass genocide. HIV's pretty bad though.

Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

What do you get wen u cross a cat and a walrus? Two animals with very different life styles.

How many blonde's does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to hold the ladder and one to peel the carrotts

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife just died from pancreatic cancer."

Last night I had a Chinese By that I mean I abducted some Chinese people and ate them

im a straight dude and all the gay dudes at school make fun of me oh wait i wrote that backwards

Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

Roused are red violets are blue I just s*** in my own poo

what's the difference between a dog and a sheep? one's a dog and the other isn't.

Its a bird...its a plane....it IS a plane

Do you really want to know what i shit? Poo

I saw a shovel once.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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