Billy Corgan: The world is a vampire! Me: No it's not. The world is a mass of mineral compounds that floats in space approximately 93,020,000 miles from the sun. It is not, in fact, a vampire.

Why didn't the man stop at the stop sign? He was violently killed turning at the last intersection

If you and Chuck Norris have five dollars you both have the same amount of money.

There was a girl who had a dream of becoming a famous movie star. So, after five years of hard work and dedication, she didn't become a famous movie star. Dreams don't always come true. Refrigerators keep things cold.

im black

why did the turtle beat the rabbit ? because the rabbit eventually got shot

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

what do you call a 40 year old man working at a burger king that dropped out of highschool dyslexic

What did rosa parks get for christmas? -Racism

How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head underwater for a long time.

Why cant helen keller drive Because shes a woman

Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

Farmers are outstanding in their fields

What's black and makes me food? A microwave.

What did the white man say to the black man? Hello

Why are small clowns and baby's alike? They both dreadfully die when hit in the face with an axe!

Ask me if you can see my dinosaur. Can I see your dinosaur? No dinosaurs don't exist sillyhead!

Roses are red, Violets are VIOLET!

Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

Did you know Hellen Keller had a dollhouse in her backyard? Neither did she.

A black man and a jew both fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? the black man

What did the avocado say to the person? I can't talk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...