A duck walks into a bar and the bartender says"What do u want?" The ducks replays "EVERY DAY IM SHUFFLING!!!" The bartender slaps the duck in its face and quid his job. The bar has a hard time finding a replacement and his business dies. THE END

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

poop

Why did the mushroom get invited to the party? He is a fun-gi!!

What's the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies? My wife didn't cheat on me in a pile of dead babies.

What's the difference between watermelon and baby? I don't eat watermelon.

Why did the dog kill the fish? He had no reason, he just wanted fish. What, you thought he had like, a vendetta? pssh your crazy

Jerry Sandusky prefers twenty eight year olds. 20 eight year olds.

yo mama so fat she has diabetes.

A man walks into a bar and the barenter says, "What'll it be?" The man says, "I'll take a Bud Light."

A disabled man walks into a bar.

What is worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

Your mom is so fat...

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

What's worse than spending time with your girlfriend? Nothing.

How many cats get hit by a car per day How ever many cats you can find

Would you believe me if i said... ^^^^ You read that line wrong?

What has two legs and is covered in red. Half a dog.

What's purple and has four wheels? A frog, except for the purple and four wheels part.

What do u call a man with no arms and no legs and is laying in front of a door? Matt

Why did the man follow the law? He didn't want to get arrested

Is that a threat or a promise? dragonflies

Why did John kill Maris? Because Maris killed his family.

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&Ms factory? Because she slapped the boss when he made a pass at her. Afterwhich she reported the incident to her Union and the boss was fired for Sexual Harassment. She was then rehired with a substantial increase in salary.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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