Canada AYY

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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Yo' mama's such a hoe she got arrested last week for prostitution charges!

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What is 9 inches long, the same colour as my skin, and makes my girlfriend gag when I shove it down her throat? Her Miscarriage.

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What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

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What's more annoying than a mosquito? the Sandy Hook Massacre

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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4 black men wearing ski masks and stripped jumpers kicked my door open and ran into my house knocking over and breaking things. They then realised this was not their friends house, apologised, paid for the damaged and left for the fancy dress party.

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What do you call a hobo that lives a in a box. A hobo

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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Why is the sky blue? The sun reflects off the water molecules in all bodies of water

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Why was the first name of the boy 'Price'? His parents were Hamsters.

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What is green and has weels? A green bycicle.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? Probably one. Replacing a light-bulb is a pretty simple task which any person (regardless of ethnicity) should be able to do without assistance.

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Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

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Man walks into a gun store, buys a gun. The same man goes home and lives happily till he dies of cancer. His son takes the gun shots himself, survives then later dies of cancer.

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Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?.

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Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

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A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

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Why was the little boy upset? He was on fire.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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