Q: What do you call three black people in a car? A: Maltesers

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Canada AYY

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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What do you call a hobo that lives a in a box. A hobo

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What's the difference between a tomato and a rhinoceros? Neither of them can ride a bicycle.

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So a leg, an arm and a head win the Boston marathon. And I'm sitting here masturbating, ...

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What do you call 99 lawyers in a car going off a cliff with no driver and another lawyer running in the other direction? A dick move.

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What is harder than Jenga? Being a quadraplegic.

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to a chicken

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

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Why are tootsie rolls brown? because they are....

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what would you like to drink?". The horse, unable to comprehend english, just nods and proceeds to shit on the floor

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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What did Jim say to Bob? Hi Bob.

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Man walks into a gun store, buys a gun. The same man goes home and lives happily till he dies of cancer. His son takes the gun shots himself, survives then later dies of cancer.

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Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will have her institutionalized as soon as they find her.

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Why is Cindy crying? She got a branch stuck in her eye which irritated her sensitive cornea so her tear duct produced a tear to help shed the material from her eye.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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