What has 4 eyes and can't see. Blind siamese twins!

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If you have 5 dollars, and Chuck Norris has 5 dollars, you are both very poor.

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Toys -Lets Go MEts

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

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what did the chinese guy say to the black guy? hello

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What do Texans call cows? Cows. Calling them almost anything else would be utterly illogical.

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Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

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a dyslexic man came on this website thinking it was made by his aunt Tina keoj he was sadly mistaken. it was just a bunch of jokes about dyslexic men going into bars

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javascript:alert("your own");

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you came 'cause GameGrumps Fuck you.

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want a balloon? yeah

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Whats the best ab workout? Solly Twist

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i got angry and i was like " i really want to kick someone" ,my friend was on the ground and shes like "you can kick me" ,and i'm like "REALLY" ,then i kicked her really hard and she cried...

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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What did Don King do with his new boxers? Put them on with a respectable pair of trousers.

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What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

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what did the parapelegic (limbless) kid get for his birthday? Heart failure

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No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

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why did the chicken cross the road? Does it matter why, it just did.

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knock knock who's there? a murderer. a murderer who? a murderer who kills you and your family.

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Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he was dead.

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Q, whats worst then being trapped in a house with a ghost. A, being trapped in a house with thirteen ghosts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops