how do you make a blonde snowman? hollow out the head.

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What did the fat gypsy say to the attractive young woman aged twenty-five? I know you are probably not remotely interested in having sex with me, but I'm afraid that you have no choice due to the fact that I've locked all of the doors.

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What did the transvestite hooker say when he/she saw a robot fighting a dinosaur? That's strange.

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"KNOCK KNOCK". I opened the door to greet my guests for the party.

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Why did kurt cobain kill himself? He was experiencing heavy depression

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Why did Alice fail Maths? Because everybody else was Asian.

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I am not Moral Man. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUU

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A Priest, A Pedofile, and a Rapist walk into a bar. He Orders A Drink

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What did one ocean say to the other ocean, nothing it just waved

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Why did the quick brown fox jump in the lake? He did not see lake on the other side of the lazy dog.

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Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

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heads up!

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what do you call a gay guy Ej

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how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

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Knock, knock No, I do not want to hear about God.

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Why does the man with no legs call for help? because he woke up to find that he had no legs.

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why do girraffe's have long necks? because my foot is so far up all their asses that it hits their head, pushing it away from the body.

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what is long hard and full of seamen......... A sumbirine..........................(what were you thinking)

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Whats the difference imbetween a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer an the other is a watermelon

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"I like my women like I like my spare tires, in the trunk of my car." -Paul Alangadan

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How do you get 2000 people to go to heaven? Blow up a school.

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bucket of poop. The Mexican is a human the bucket of poop is an object filled bodily wastes.

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What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting raped mercilessly by Ronald McDonald.

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Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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