How do you kill a blonde? Stab her...

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Why did the fat lady poop on my knee? Because i'm thirsty.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

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What do you get when you cross an intersection? Possibly a lower leg contussion, ACL tear, breaks in 4 different sections of your arm and lots of brain swelling if you are hit by a car.

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How do you call a man in a wheelchair? Disabled.

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What's black, white, green, red, blue, orange, gray, purple, and yellow? My art project.

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Whats red and hurts when you bite into it? A brick.

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What do you call a cow in the grass... A cow in the grass... Dumbas*

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how do you blindfold an asian...a piece of dental floss

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How did the Mexican got into USA? Trough the border.

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How can you put 2 elephants in a bottle without touching each other. You put an elephant between them.

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What is the difference between a duck. One of its legs are both the same.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbuluDBHpfQ

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--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

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What's black and blue and hates anal? The twelve year old in my trunk

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A blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead walk into a bar. They all buy a drink and talk about their days.

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Obama

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why did the chicken cross the road??? I don't know, that's why I asked you -_-

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Ya know what's sad? You can only submit one dislike on this website.

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Q Why did the man run away from his shadow? A He didn't it was physicaly impossible.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" So the horse says, "My ex-wife just got full custody of my kids and I'll never see them again."

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2 women were sitting quietly

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three men get stranded on a island and cannibals find them and they say go find 3 fruits and come back. first guy comes back with three apples and they say we will shuve them in your rectum and if you scream we will kill you he screams he dies. second guy comes back with grapes and he laughs before they can start. and in heaven the first guy says why did you laugh and he says there voices are funny.

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A man see's a bird and tries to get its attention by whistling at it, much like if it were a dog. The mans whistle fails to get the birds attention because birds have wings and dogs do not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops