Teacher: Billy what do you want to be when you grow up? Billy: A fireman! Teacher: Tommy what do you want to be when you grow up? Tommy: 9/11

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WHO the FUK are Waseem ? and Jess ??!!!!

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a blonde, a brunette and a red head are robbing a bank, they hear the police coming, so they try to find a place to hide. The red head hides in cat cage, the brunette hides in dog cage and the blonde hides in potatoe sack. When the police come the brunetter says "Woof, Woof!" the red head says "MEOW! MEOW!" and the blonde says "P-O-T-A-T-O-E!"

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What's the difference between a dead baby and an apple? I don't cum on an apple before I eat it.

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That's what she didn't say

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Thank you for booking with Anti-Joke Travel Agency. Here is your trip itinerary: 1. Your toilet

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Why did the plan crash? Because the pilot was a potato

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What did the man say to the other man? You smell nice today.

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No, we got to speak now, or you know, never.

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Suzie hates cancer, Her granny got killed by a driver that suffered from it

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A father walks in on his kid masturbating to pictures of horses and promptly divorces his wife.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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An irishman walks into a bar and orders a beer.

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to call animal control.

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What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

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irish wristwatch JLR

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What happened to the cat that fell in the bath? It jumped out feeling cold and embarrassed.

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what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

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Two cats were in a bathtub. They both, however, were uneasy the whole time, as it is common sense to know that cats do not like being in water.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Ask the starving African.

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Why did the white kids accept Morgan Freeman as a kid? All of his school-mates looked up to him

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Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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