What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump!

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

What's the difference between dead babies and Christmas lights? I don't have Christmas lights hanging on my Christmas tree...

Can you guess the following words? Boo*s s*x *orn g*y cu*t b*tch Answers: Books, six, horn, guy, cult, batch.

Why do women hate getting shot? They die.

How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

What's worse than molding bread? Babies in the toaster.

If life throws you melons, not only might you be dyslexic, but you are probably also uneducated, since the phrase is "if life gives you lemons".

What's up brah brah

Kid: knock knock Orphan: whos there? Kid: not your parents

Guess what! what haha u listened to me

25

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A. One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a highly trained professional skilled in the art of litigation.

A man walked into a bar Ouch.

Your mother is so fat........... that she is morbidly obese and is at severe risk for diabetes and other weight related diseases.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Shmellmype. Shmellmype who? HAHAHAHAHA (read out loud)

Person A - I farted Person B - YUCK

ROSES ARE RED WATCHES ARE GOLD GET ON YOUR KNEES AND DO WHAT YOUR TOLD

What is worse than a person eating cereal? A black person eating white children.

what did the police do when they saw an arab running towards a building? Watched him run by because he was probably late for something

What's worse than finding a fly in your drink? Gonorrhea.

Knock knock Who's there This is the police, open the door. I don't know anybody by that name

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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