whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

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What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at poems show me your boobs

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Neither does he.

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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What did the dinosaur and John Wayne say to the Easter Bunny? Nothing, they're both dead and the Easter Bunny isn't real.

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Why couldn't the boy sing? The boy could sing, but the thick layer of duct tape prevented him from doing so.

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A: What did the banana say to the other banana? B: I don't know, what? A: I don't know either, I was hoping you did.

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What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

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penus

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roses are red violets are blue no one likes raisen bran except your mom

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

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how many boys does it take to use 4 computers? 4.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You're not that bad...you're still better at giving hand jobs than your dad is."

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What is 0+0? 0, I am not dumb

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Why did the elephants get in a taxi? They were going to the airport.

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why does one side of a v-flock of geese have more birds? Because it does.

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Why did the man get a haircut? Because he had long hair.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is blue too

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A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

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Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

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What did the pregnant teenager get for her birthday? An abortion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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