What do you a call a person who can't fly. A person.

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"How come dinosaurs don't talk?" " I don't know. Why?" " Because they're dead."

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A man walks into a car. And drive's off.

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Guess what these words are: boo_s p_n_s _ _ ndom s_x fu_k wan_er Answers: books,pants,random,six,funk,wander.

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why did the boy drown? because water entered his lungs and suffocated him.

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i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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Think about it: Is mexico REALLY full of: Lowrides in candy ass sparkly colors such as lip red that bounce, (manly color right? Yeah sure baggot) which contains a whole street war gang of members inside and at least twenty tons of COCAINA! ...But does not have a horn that plays "la cucaracha" Seriously, you say yes right? Hey look at this guy he said yes everybody, but ITS WROOOOOOONG CUCARACHA OR GTFO OF MEXICO! Yeah... Because Mexico is shit, id would be racist if Mexicans didn't agree...

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Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He had no limbs

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What is Megan Fox's middle name? Denise

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A man walks into a bar. He asked the bartender if he accepts $100 bills. The bartender says "no".

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A family's house was possessed by ghosts causing them great fear and discomfort. Who are they gonna call? A real estate agent.

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what did the man with no arm get for Christmas? A rowboat

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There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

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What's funnier than a comedic movie? Genocide

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Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

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Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

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How do white people screw in light bulbs? They read a manual.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Oh, then I'm not opening the door.

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Why do you always loose your keys at monster truck rally's? Most likely because they fell out during all the excitement of jumping up and down, but the real reason is because they are afraid of monster cars.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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