two elderly men were sitting in the sun discussing their lives. The first man says "my life was horrible as I had to walk to work uphill in the snow with no boots on a daily basis" The second man looks at the first and replies "you know why my life was horrible?.. I was born a jewish man in Germany during the second world war and was injustly judged and harrassed nearly to death on a daily basis"

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

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How many dead babies can you fit in my car? None, I don't allow anyone to put dead babies in my car.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face!

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

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rosses are red voilets are pinkey your mams pussy is really stinky

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Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

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A blond and a redhead are walking down the street the red head says look a dead bird the blond looks up

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No, we got to speak now, or you know, never.

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What is the hardest part about rollerblading? Most commonly the balance part.

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what do you watch ? a tv

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if I was a girl I would be touching my self everywhere if I was a girl as a boy I would make a diffrence in poltics but thats not gonna happen.

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Why did Max drink the red Gatorade? Because he likes it more than all of the other flavors.

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why couldn't the the black man get a job? because he doesn't posses the correct work ethic.

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Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

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Hitler: Ve shud vork togeza and place stategic bombs overr your island. Castro: You are dead.

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why did the monkey fall dead out of the tree? because edward cullen raped it up the arse sooo many times it died from internal bleeding.

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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson? I thought you were dead.

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What's better than four dead babies in one trashcan? Nothing. Those babies could have grown up to be new heads of state or even the doctor who discovers the cure for cancer.

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Wow did you see stevie wonder's new house. neither has he

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Roses are red Violets are blue this poem makes no sense Potato

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i cant think of one.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

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What do you call a gay couple of kangaroos adopted baby A Joey

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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