Why didnt the car turn on? Cause the keys werent in the ignition

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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What's the difference between watermelon and baby? I don't eat watermelon.

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *smiles* Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust ascending from hell.

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why hppened when the little boy failed his math test? He cut off his penis, shaved his head and hung himself

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What did the judge say to the midget when he sent him to jail ? Stop beating your wife

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matt f stupid because no one likes him

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Knock Knock! Well come on in!

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I ponder

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Why did the Mexican drive off a cliff Because he lost control of his vehicle which resulted in an unplanned trajectory causing his car to divert from the intended course and thus veer off the road onto the cliff

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knock knock. come in.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs. Why couldn't she see? The sun was in her eyes.

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What is long and hard that a bride gets on her wedding night? An erect penis.

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What did the overweight blind kid get for Christmas? His parents died in a tragic car crash and he was left alone, fat and blind to fend for himself

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Q: What do you call a dog after the dentist? A: A dog.

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While I was walking home from school one day, James Brown jumped out of a bush and punched me in the face. Then, when I got home, there was a walrus sitting on my couch. He then turned to look at me and said, "Penis". I then immediately farted out blades of grass.

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Badgers are cool

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"Welcome to Mcdonalds, Would you like to try our new Chicken BigMac today?" "No"

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Doctor, Doctor, I feel like I don't know anyone... Uh...who are you?

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A man walks into a bar and the barenter says, "What'll it be?" The man says, "I'll take a Bud Light."

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I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Death is inevitable.

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raping black women

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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