Roses are red, Violets are blue when I saw you what the heel are you

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What is a black guy's favorite hobby? Stamp collecting.

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If Jimmy has 60 candy bars and eats 50 of them, what does he have? Diabetes.

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3 Jews walk into a bar. Few minutes later a penny is dropped. This resenct occation causes a bar fight to brake out.

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Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

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There is no joke here, stop reading.

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Whats worse then the quote "Do it, hit her!" The quote "Do it, Hitler!"

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Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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Darkness Falls Across The Land The Midnite Hour Is Close At Hand Creatures Crawl In Search Of Blood To Terrorize Y'awl's Neighbourhood And Whosoever Shall Be Found Without The Soul For Getting Down Must Stand And Face The Hounds Of Hell And Rot Inside A Corpse's Shell The Foulest Stench Is In The Air The Funk Of Forty Thousand Years And Grizzy Ghouls From Every Tomb Are Closing In To Seal Your Doom And Though You Fight To Stay Alive Your Body Starts To Shiver For No Mere Mortal Can Resist The Evil Of The Thriller

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

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An 8 year old, a 9 year old, and jerry sandusky walk into a shower...

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What's the difference between a cup of tea and a polar bear? A polar bear is a bear whilst a cup of tea is a beverage

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varför skriver jag på svenska jag vet inte

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Hey guys! Today is September 10th you know what tomorrow means? Party at my house! ...What? It's my birthday.

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What do birds need when they are sick? Most wild animals die when they are sick. However, they can sometimes be nursed back to health with special food and electrolyte solutions in special animal rehabilitation centres.

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What did the victim say to the rapist? If you're gonna rape me, at least let me go get you a condom

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Why did the chicken cross the street? To get to your house. Knock Knock Who is there. The chicken.

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What do you call a loser on a game? A Dirty Hacker

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Why didn't Billy have legs? Because he's a fish.

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Life is an elephant, get married.

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What did the blonde say to the chicken? mmm, delicious

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A dyslexic woman goes into a saloon and asks for a hair cut. Oh right, she doesn't have hair! Then why the f*** would she enter the saloon? Because she wanted to get her nails done. But she doesn't have nails either, and she doesn't want to drink. She came there because she wanted to hook up with a guy!

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Knock knock. Whose there? Not my house so not my problem. Frankly, I don't give a shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops