What did the man say to the other man? You smell nice today.

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What do you call a black man inside a house that is on fire? A fire fighter as well as a hero since he was probably inside the house searching for anyone who was trapped inside

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The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

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School

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Knock Knock Who's there? I bought a Jeep

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What do you call something that has two legs, arms and is bloody all over? My ex's new boyfriend.

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Why did the man bring the computer to the doctor because it had a virus

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Nock Nock. Whose there? The chicken.

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Suzie hates cancer, Her granny got killed by a driver that suffered from it

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar? "Hi, may I buy you a drink?"

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Q: Whats the difference between a Chicken and Your Mom? A: I dont eat the chicken

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Q:how many anti jokes does it take to make a person lough A:1

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What do you call a black man in an envelope? A tiny black man

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...this makes a cop throw a car and then call "inception!"

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girl: why do you love me? boy: i don't.

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What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? Nothing. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said objects are, are in no way capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant? While the term "Mexican" encompasses a wide range of individuals and individual predilections, the most common cibarious preference would likely be a food that is reminiscent of his or her homeland; that is, what we refer to as Mexican food. An authentic nearby joint sporting such provisions would likely be the most common preference, but, as this description can only be traced on the local scale, a specific restaurant that covers a wider range of locations would be a more appropriate answer. Among the top choices are Taco Time and Taco Del Mar.

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Darkness Falls Across The Land The Midnite Hour Is Close At Hand Creatures Crawl In Search Of Blood To Terrorize Y'awl's Neighbourhood And Whosoever Shall Be Found Without The Soul For Getting Down Must Stand And Face The Hounds Of Hell And Rot Inside A Corpse's Shell The Foulest Stench Is In The Air The Funk Of Forty Thousand Years And Grizzy Ghouls From Every Tomb Are Closing In To Seal Your Doom And Though You Fight To Stay Alive Your Body Starts To Shiver For No Mere Mortal Can Resist The Evil Of The Thriller

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Whats worse then the quote "Do it, hit her!" The quote "Do it, Hitler!"

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

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why did the polar bear bury his face into snow? because he saw the 241543903 post and wanted to join in so he used a portal gun to teleport his head into some guy's freezer.

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Nock Nock It's open.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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