Patient: Doctor, I've been having a problem, I can't remember anything. Doctor: Do you think you might have amnesia, a common memory problem. Patient: What Problem?

Chuck Norris doesn't answer the phone - he doesn't have one at the moment

What did the leper say to the prostitute? "I am an undercover police office and you're under arrest for prostitution, ma'am."

why did Mary fall off the swing? cuz she had no arms ------------------- knock,knock who's there? not Mary

If I had 10 cents for every time a hobo asked for change i still wouldn't give him any money

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? A question and answering session of information used to test knowledge of a specific idea or person.

What do a blond and a jar of marmalade have in common? Nothing, they are completely different.

Membean

A dinosaur walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender goes home and tells his wife what he saw. His wife leaves him.

What came first the chicken or the egg? The chicken god made two of every animal

What is brown and sticky? A stick

Why did the dog bite justin beiber? Why not?

A mexican man killed a black man yesterday. It had nothing to do with his race, he just had a very rough childhood and wasn't taught moral values.

What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

Whu did the boy drop his cheeseburger? Because the school janitor whacked him with a mallet.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? -a black man that left his family

A black guy walks into a bar... *3 hours later* He walks out...

What happened to Kurt Cobain? He committed suicide. He shot himself in the head with a shotgun and then he died.

Why did the yeti make an omlette? To practise making omlettes.

What's the difference between a rabbit and a Rabbi? Rabbits are of the family Leporidea, whereas Rabbi's are Jewish.

The anti joke that repeats itself :(

knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

My nieghbor is blonde, but she doesnt like corn dogs or anything of that sort because her boyfriend is mexican. Mexcans are banned from eating corn dogs because they illegally crossed the border. Her dog wieghs about 8.9485763 pounds. Her nieghbor also protests corndogs because she cant fit throught her customized door which was 39 feet long. Why was six afraid of seven? because that lady is 700 pounds.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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