Roses are red Violets are twisted bend over now your about to get fisted

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What's black and white and red all over? A car in which some young hoodlum appears to have splashed a fair amount of red paint over the owner's otherwise charming checker pattern.

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What did little Timmy get his grandmother for Christmas? A coffin

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Who graduated top of their class, got their degree two years early and lead a very successful life? Not you

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Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

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What happened when a 16 year old guy went over to his friends party? found out he wasn't friends with anyone there, got kicked out and committed suicide.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply because he was incapable of speech.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus.

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Why did Dom stop smoking He didnt I lied

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What did the customer say to the waitier? "I think I'll have the special."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a metaphor.

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Q: what do you call obama A:a dumbass

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Why was there a black man and a white man in a bar? Due to the probability of this occurance happening due to percentages of black/white people in a bar, this specific situation should be of no shock, in fact it is a completely normal occurance one of which should not be questioned

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did Little Timmy fall off of his bike? Because he was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator. Knock knock Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

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The WNBA.

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What did one baby say to the other? Nothing, they're both dead.

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Q.What has flashing lights and really bad dancing A.Baby haveing an eppilectic fit

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, I am color blind.

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this guy didnt get any pussy last night so go easy on him I I I V

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What is black, white, and red all over? A bleeding zebra.

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Why was the kid happy? Because it was his birthday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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