What do you call a pair of banana peels? Trash.

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How do you kill a blonde? By inactivating major functions in the body, for example cutting off the blood supply to the brain.

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why did the boy drown? because water entered his lungs and suffocated him.

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Why'd humpty dumpy fall of the wall? Someone threw a fridge at him

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Jim: "Hey guess what" Bill: "What" Jim: "George Bush got reelected" *Bill proceeds to throw himself into the Atlantic Ocean.*

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Yo mamma's so fat, at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that if she did not attempt to control her weight gain through a careful moderation of her diet and began exercising on a regular basis, that her obesity would soon manifest itself in a variety of chronic health conditions that would permanently alter her ability to enjoy life and could significantly decrease her lifespan.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

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What did the fat man with scissors do? Cut off the foreskin of your penis.

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Nock Nock It's open.

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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson? I thought you were dead.

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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What did the black kid get for his birthday?

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? playing spin the bottle with your mom

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A:why did sam fall of the wing ? B:why ? A:she had no arms. B:... A:knock knock. B: who is there ? A:not sam

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What's green has eight legs, and would kill you of it fell on you from the top of a tree? A Billiard table

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What do you call Americas first black president? A change.

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There is no joke here, stop reading.

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What did the blonde say to the man when he asked her what time it was? 6:34 pm

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In soviet Russia - some people were poor.

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Two men walk into a bar. The bar was being robbed. They were both shot in the confusion.

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How many software professionals does it take to get a file committed to source control? Well, today it took five.

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What do you call a hispanic and black man flying a plane? A pilot and his co-pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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