Chicken

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The Hollocaust. What's worse than the Hollocaust? 3 bee stings.

A Kid goes to Band Camp and comes back distinctly better at the Trumpet.

Why are fat people fat? Because they like food.

What did the African want for breakfast? Ebola cereal

Knock knock. Who's there? Cook Pu. Ok then. Kelvin Yang.

I was visiting my grandad the other day and my phone died, I was really bored, he told me I rely too much on technology I replied with 'no you do' and Unplugged his life support

How do you confuse a gay person? How? 7

Women's rights

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Why does Danny work at the factory? Because Danny is in an substantial economic crisis, and doesn't have enough money to afford food for his 6 kids and wife. They will all most likely die soon, as his factory job will not provide enough money.

An Indian man left a 20% tip after eating at the closest restaurant to him

What happened to Emma? I raped her!

yo mamma so fat she got pied to be the Olympic swimming pool

What do you call a person who uses food stamps? Poor. What do you call a black person who uses food stamps? Still poor.

What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run, 'cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!

Electronic Arts is a respectable company.

Two guys walk into a bar.

Knock, knock. *answers door*

knock knock who's there no one

what's brown and sticky? A stick!

Q: What did Robin Williams say to the young boy? A: Nothing, He is dead

theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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