what do you call a fish with no eyes? fsh

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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I had a dream, then i died in it and now i'm dead but who cares, how are you ?

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Why can't Bob go to the store? He's dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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Q: What is that white stuff in chicken shit? A: Thats chicken shit too

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kyle dosnt question his sexuality

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What's better than eating baby? Nothing.

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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Patients: Whats happening doctor Doctor: I am afraid you all have tested positive Patients: Oh No!!! Doctor: Positive for being great friends all these years! Patients: Oh Doctor you are so.... Doctor: ASWELL AS AIDS!!!

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One splatters and makes a big red mark on the ground when dropped from a building. The other is a fruit.

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A jew walks into a bar.... He has a beer and then goes home to his family.

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The WNBA.

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A boy has a penis, a girl has a vagina.

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How did jimmy get hurt?? someone throw a fridge at him..

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Knock, Knock... Who's there? Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

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Yo mama so fat, that when she wore a blue swimsuit to the beach and swam, the Blue Whales started sing, "WE ARE FAAMILY...EVEN THOUGH UR BUGGER THAN ME!!!"

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Why did the Muslim enter the bar? He didn't.

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Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocost

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What is faster than a black guy stealing a TV? His brother with a DVR

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Why couldn't the old lady take her Afghan Hound to the vet after the dog had been brutally harassed? She was dead.

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1Q: Quick! Ask me if I'm a lemon!! 2A: Your not a lemon 1A: :/ oh :/

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A socialist, a Muslim, and an illegal immigrant walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for you Mr.President

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops