What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

why are black people so good at basketball? because they all can run jump steal and shoot

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, And I'm blind.

Whats the difference imbetween a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer an the other is a watermelon

Your mother is SO wealthy, that she should help stop the poor children in Africa from starving by donating some spare change to the Let's-Help-Stop-The-Poor-Little-African-Children-From-Starving donation center. -not a real place!!!!!

How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

A Priest, A Pedofile, and a Rapist walk into a bar. He Orders A Drink

10 people walk into a bar. 6 hours later, 3 more people walk into the bar. There are now 12 people in the bar, and one corpse in the dumpster out back.

What did one ocean say to the other ocean, nothing it just waved

Why did the Jew die? Because Hitler was born...

a gay couple walks into a bar and get a drink

What did the man with Tourette's say to the other man? Surely something he did not mean to say.

What do you call a guy who answers your door Whatever his name his

Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

Q: What's worse than a rainy day? A:

why are you adopted? cause no one loved you.

Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

I AM SOFA KING WE TOD HEAD - AV

Why did the Mexican choose the blue marker over the green one? Because he his favorite color was green, and it was Opposite Day.

what time is it? 3:16

What did the one bagpiper say to the other? Nothing, one cannot speak while playing the bagpipes.

Did you hear about the plane that crashed and killed 1000 people? My sister has cancer.

Gangnam style

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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