Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

How many software professionals does it take to get a file committed to source control? Well, today it took five.

What do you call a black man in an envelope? A tiny black man

What do you call you're mum? Depends who's reading it or just mum

What did the pornstar do after the film shoot? Called her parents and said she had a good day at work as a receptionist at a law firm. She is too ashamed to admit her real profession to them. She then cried profusely.

What's worse than being a ginger? Being a soulless ginger

Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

What's heavy, black, and when hanging by a rope from a tree, makes white people happy? A tire, in any white football player's backyard.

A

A duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man running the stand "Quack"! because he's a duck... and that's what ducks do.

McDonald's... Giving people with swag jobs since 1942.

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

Whis a racist rapist etter than a non-racist rapist? less women getting raped

why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

Youve got to spell the name right you dead dylan fuck

- Knock knock - Those knock jokes are getting old - Indeed. Scratch scratch - MY DOOR

you thought i was going to write a joke.. bitch

What do you call a puppy with no limbs? It doesn't matter, he's never coming back.

What happened after Peter broke his toe? He went into cardiac arrest and died.

Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it ain't gonna.

Your mama is so fat she has a high BMI and is at a high-risk of Type II Diabetes.

i like my women like i like my coffee without a penis

theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

if you give somebody a dollar and they give you a different dollar you both have a dollar

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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