What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

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Your mother is SO wealthy, that she should help stop the poor children in Africa from starving by donating some spare change to the Let's-Help-Stop-The-Poor-Little-African-Children-From-Starving donation center. -not a real place!!!!!

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Whats the difference imbetween a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer an the other is a watermelon

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, And I'm blind.

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Why did the Jew die? Because Hitler was born...

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a gay couple walks into a bar and get a drink

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A Priest, A Pedofile, and a Rapist walk into a bar. He Orders A Drink

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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What did the man with Tourette's say to the other man? Surely something he did not mean to say.

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What do you call a guy who answers your door Whatever his name his

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

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10 people walk into a bar. 6 hours later, 3 more people walk into the bar. There are now 12 people in the bar, and one corpse in the dumpster out back.

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What did one ocean say to the other ocean, nothing it just waved

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I AM SOFA KING WE TOD HEAD - AV

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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How did the snail travel around the world without any help from a transportation device? Sadly, it didn't. The snail is incapable of this kind of long distance travel due to it's small size, lack of speed and short lifespan.

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hi will

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How do you get 2000 people to go to heaven? Blow up a school.

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"I like my women like I like my spare tires, in the trunk of my car." -Paul Alangadan

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What is black and white and red all over? Yemen's national flag.

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My bologna has a first name It's O-S-C-A-R... My bologna has a second name It's M-A-Y-E-R... Oscar and Mayer were the names of the pig and the cow that were slaughtered and subsequently processed into the bologna I am eating.

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four little monkeys jumping on the bed... one fell of and bumped his head... mama called the doctor and the doctor said... im calling child protection services.

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what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? Nazis did't burn the pizza

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops